Friday, March 14, 2008

The Good, Bad and the Ugly

Hi ho, hi ho, off to work we go... That has been my theme for the last few months. I've tried to find enough motivation to write for this damn blog, but I really couldn't muster it. Until now.

Here we are in March and the CG films are about to begin. Horton Hears a Who opens today! I have to say the film looks awfully pretty. This may call for an actual trip to the movie theater. I'm hoping for an over $50 million weekend for this latest Blue Sky offering. The animation industry needs it!

Kung Fu Panda is being polished and will be kicking its way to a theater soon. Jack Black can be really annoying or really funny. I have my fingers crossed that the latter is the case. I'm somewhat eager to see this.

The Disney folks have just released another Wall-E trailer. You have to hand it to Pixar for such gorgeous imagery. I'm especially delighted (did I just use that word?) by the camera work. Not wanting to be mistaken for a Pixar kiss-ass, I'll throw in that obligatory "I'm not so sure about the story" comment.

Hold on a second! You are probably asking why I'm so oddly positive about everything written so far. Keep reading my fellow smack talkers.

When I made my post many months ago regarding the Space Chimps trailer and how ugly it looked, you wouldn't believe all the emails I received. After about the 15th message, I got the point. It wasn't a real trailer, nor were those the final character looks. Because I'm such a nice guy in non-blog life, I thanked those that wrote me. Well, except for the rude and obnoxious ones. I gave them the business.

OMG!

To those rude ones, I dedicate the rest of this paragraph to you. The what I'm assuming are the final character renders that are being parlayed out recently, look almost as crappy as the ones I saw in that trailer. The chimp in the poster over on Latino Review makes me want to vomit. He looks like one of those ugly plastic faced monkeys I had as a 4 year old. Anyone over the age of 35 probably knows what I'm talking about.

I'm fairly certain that there was a conversation at some point that started like this: "Boy, that monkey looks an awful lot like a real monkey. Can we instead make him look more like a furry boy? You know, just like that kid in the super-awesome movie Jumanji?" No doubt this comment came from the same guy that said "I've got an idea for an animated comedy! What does the world like more than World War 2? Pigeons! Everyone loves pigeons AND war. Let's combined the two together!"

Maybe the story is funny and endearing and all the good things in life. However, those monkeys look like hell.

If that doesn't stir the hornets nest again, I don't know what will. Send me those loving emails! Deep down inside, you know I'm right.

Why stop there? I'm on a roll! I might as well offend even more people while I'm at it. This time it's pointed at DreamWorks and the teaser trailer for Madagascar "The Crate Escape". I ask, does this movie really deserve a sequel? I hope that it focuses on the penguins because that was the only thing worth building on. Okay, so this wasn't really that venomous of an attack. I just wanted the Space Chimps people to feel like I wasn't just picking on them. When in reality I am.

There you have it. Some positive and some negative comments. What a well rounded post. I'm so proud of myself!

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Here is quote from your page:

"I'm fairly certain that there was a conversation at some point that started like this: "Boy, that monkey looks an awful lot like a real monkey. Can we instead make him look more like a furry boy? You know, just like that kid in the super-awesome movie Jumanji?" No doubt this comment came from the same guy that said "I've got an idea for an animated comedy! What does the world like more than World War 2? Pigeons! Everyone loves pigeons AND war. Let's combined the two together!"

Your site looks very professional and feels that way, or at least it did until I read the above. This kind of petty childish rant isn't worthy of your site. This type of attack makes you seem like a vindictive, small minded and unprofessional person who is not to be relied upon for an expert and authoritative POV.

Can you imagine anyone at Pixar or Dreamworks animation talking smack like this about a smaller budgeted animated film? Not on their web page...

I really like your site, but personally I would avoid this kind of nasty petty stuff that drags down the value of the good stuff you've got.

Just one person's opinion.

Staloren said...

I never meant the visitors of this website to perceive that I am an expert to be relied upon. Please throw away that assumption immediately.

"I really like your site, but personally I would avoid this kind of nasty petty stuff that drags down the value of the good stuff you've got."

But that's what this site is built upon. And why I started in the first place. To speak my mind, to bitch and moan. There is a lot of great stuff out there and a lot of crap. I like to comment about all of it.

Anonymous said...

Space Chimps! truly ghastly

Anonymous said...

That's a chimp? WHOO boy...

Yappy said...

LOLLL! I just love reading your blog. I applaud you for your honesty. *Claps...whoo!*

Btw, I totally agree. I really wish I can speak my mind like you. If only I have a way to make sure my bosses aren't reading my blog.

Anonymous said...

WALL-E looks absolutely awful.
I can't understand why there is so much positive buzz about this film. If anyone other than Pixar produced this ugly, derivative looking thing, they would be deservedly criticized. HORTON HEARS A WHO looks a thousand per cent better.
You're right about SPACE CHIMPS looking like junk. It's made by the producer of VALIANT,so it's no wonder that it looks the way it does.

Anonymous said...

It isn't a monkey. It's a chimp. The movie is called Space Chimps, not Space Monkeys.

In the future, please think before typing.

Anonymous said...

I had a decent laugh at your comment about the design process. Maybe it did look too much like real chimp, a cg real chimp is a scary thing. What would you have the chimp look like if not a lovable fuzzy chimp from your past.

Do you work in cg? ever look developed a character. Fight the shaders for something that will work in all lighting conditions. Compromised heavily with all the, points of view from the hollywood producers, art directors, production designers, or even the shoot the breeze comments of co workers who have all seen the movies?

I know blogging is like being in a hypnotic state, where you can't resist the urge to criticize as a vehicle of appearing important and intelligent. With all that anonymity on your side, who can get mad. You've stated clearly this is a site for the vanity of opinionated rhetorical sophistry.

So more power to you. but i don't really know what this all makes of you as a person. Thats for you to live with.

Im not vouching for space chimps being other than whatever it is in the end in comparison to whats possible with other companies.

But poopoo'ing on all the hard work so many people put into deveoping a picture is not really integrous, even if its the snurks. They put their hearts, minds and allot of late nights into into delivery a product.

Working in cg is hard enough, making something with any bit of consistency and congruency is even harder.

So I guess that who your really spitting on, based on a poster.
Blaming a company is just a broad stroke to justify aiming at a faceless entity.
But its the guy who breaks his back, physically and technically so you have something to make yourself feel important by criticizing that's reading this.

I would have liked to post my details but who I am as someone who worked on the production is irrelevant. Im just asking you to consider who your aiming at when the urge takes you to draw attention to yourself through a blog.

Staloren said...

I appreciate your snarky reply. That's the spirit!

BTW, my comment was based on the character design. Not so much the CG aspects (although it all plays a part).

"opinionated rhetorical sophistry"

I love that. Can I use it? Maybe I can put it at the top of the blog.

I've worked on all sorts of productions. I know the compromises that go into it. My complaints aren't pointed towards the people following orders. It's the people giving the orders and making the decisions that are to blame.

Anonymous said...

quote from your last reply: "It's the people giving the orders and making the decisions that are to blame."
i think some artists need that clarification. it changes the perspective of your blog.

SpaceChimpLuvr said...

i don't get it why crew members get so defensive when it comes to criticism of the films they work on. they seem to forget that they're in a creative business that flows on positive/negative criticism. when you choose to paint a picture, you'll get some praise and some negative responses. deal with it, no need to defend your efforts.

i've been on and continue to be on the crews of many 'sinking ship' productions. it pays for the bills and my drug habit. i was once so proud of this shot i worked on i showed it to my MOM and she said 'bleh' and went back to watching reality TV.

point is, if you're on a boat that's sinking, and someone yells out, "hey, your boat is sinking." don't sit there and defend how many late nights it took you to build the boat's frame, or how hard your good buddy painted the hull. acknowledge that someone thinks your boat is sinking and make your decision, stay on or get the f#@k off.

and about the person who said... " I really wish I can speak my mind like you. If only I have a way to make sure my bosses aren't reading my blog."

this is why we get so many bad films and products, period!